


Doctor Doctor Gimme The News

by gala_apples



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M, Medical Kink, Roleplay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-03
Updated: 2020-04-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:41:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23464123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gala_apples/pseuds/gala_apples
Summary: James is into Healers. Sirius and Remus are happy to oblige.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin/James Potter
Comments: 2
Kudos: 36





	Doctor Doctor Gimme The News

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the prompt medical kink for seasonofkink.

James Potter is a problem solver, this Sirius knows. It’s why he likes Charms and Potions and Transfigurations over the more abstract Astronomy and Divination. Same reason that he’s Head Boy this year. He’s the taking care type, has never met an issue he doesn’t want to resolve. It just makes sense that that trait translates directly to his sex life. Lucky for James, Remus’ main trait is observation, and Sirius’ reckless abandon. Remus was first to notice James post werewolf transformation boners, and Sirius was the first to suggest they do something about it. And in a cyclical fashion, James’ problem solving had prioritized resolution over shame. 

It’s that fun combination of characteristics that has led them here. Sirius is laying on his back in a bed transfigured to look like the hospital wing, down to no curtains. Which makes the events about to happen more public than Sirius usually likes for his all homo threesome -there’s a difference between reckless and suicidal- but lucky for him James has a charm for that. The edges of Peter’s curtains have been woven together, as well as woven into the sheets, leaving him no way out of his bed. Trapped like a rat, so to speak. It’s an odd, exposed kind of privacy, but close enough for their needs.

Sirius signed up for everything about to happen, yet somehow it’s still a surprise when James and Remus come into view, wearing healers robes that look like they’ve been stolen right from Pomfrey’s wardrobe. Between two quidditch players and a werewolf, not to mention three pranksters, they’ve had hospital wing time to notice the details. Sirius isn’t entirely sure if they are stolen, or just transfigured. His boyfriends have both the magical skill and the petty criminality for either option.

“So I see you’ve taken a particularly nasty spill, one beyond Hooch’s field spells.”

“Yes,” Sirius moans. He’s not in pain of course, this part of it not being real, but the more he keeps up the act the better this is for James.

“Your bones are shattered enough that the standard application of Skele-Gro must be a second step. The better course of treatment is removing the offending bones and then growing some new ones.” 

This is where it gets real. Remus performs a bone removing jinx and Sirius has to remind himself he agreed to this as his arms become spaghetti noodles. It’s a disturbing feeling, made worse by gulping down the steaming beaker of whatever false potion one of them brewed to simulate Skele-Gro. He trusts that neither of them would have brewed something dangerous, but it makes his mouth hot and slick, like swallowing melted butter.

“There’s a lad,” Remus says, patting him on the thigh once the beaker is empty. At some point he’ll run him up to Pomfrey for the real treatment, or just nick some actual Skele-Gro, but the actual pins and needles pain of regrowing his humerus, ulna, and radius would take away from the sex fantasy, so it’s gonna wait.

“It’s best you stay overnight for examination,” Jame commands, every inch the stern healer. “Lively boys like those you run with, I imagine they won’t be much help in bedtime routine.”

“You’d be surprised,” Sirius can’t help but mutter. It’s too brazen for what Sirius would really say to Pomfrey, too close to outing them all, but he can’t help but praise James for the way he treats Remus in the days after when he’s still weak and sore. 

“Nonetheless, let us help you into your pyjamas.”

And here’s where it turns from real to something they can get off on. Together Remus and James take off his shirt and slowly button up his nightshirt. It’s the barest bit clinical, almost entirely caresses and feather light tickles. By the time they’ve switched his bottoms he’s fully erect.

“I’ll check on you in a bit,” James says, and strides away out of Sirius’ line of vision.

Remus looks around as if to check that he’s alone in the hospital wing. “Healer Potter would kill me for being so inappropriate but I need to ask, can I help ease your discomfort?”

Sirius considers possible answers then goes with the one most likely to produce dirty talk. Sirius loves Remus’ dirty talk. It’s part of his observational skill. “Errr, what do you mean?”

Remus reaches out to grab the bulge of his erection. “It’s a natural reaction from a young wizard. I’ve seen a lot as a healer. But seeing as you won’t be able to relieve yourself, may I suck your cock, Mr Black?”

“Healer Lupin!” James shouts, bursting back onto the scene. “What do you think you’re doing?”

Remus begins to stammer. “Healer Potter, I-”

“If you intend to comfort a patient in this way, going above and beyond, you really must restrain them to not cause more strain on their injuries. One wrong flail and the bone juts out of the forearm. You continue to administer alleviation, I’ll assist.”

James gets in the bed then, staying at the edge where he can wrap two strong hands around Sirius’ ankles. Sirius wasn’t really flailing, particularly, but this is not for him. Besides, there is an erotic element in his arms being immobile and his legs being held in place. Really makes it hard to buck into Remus’ mouth.

He comes first, of course. In a normal evening they take turns, sometimes even turning it into a bit of a competition. Tonight their attention is focused and they’re not even touching themselves yet, so there’s only one way it was going to happen.

“Senior Healer Potter, may I assist you now?”

“Just a wank, dear boy. We need to be free to move if a patient calls.”

Sirius watches avidly as James and Remus arrange their uniforms to get a hand on each other’s cocks. His boys are so fuckin’ pretty. He doesn’t even mind when they turn to him and jizz on his face.

“Honeydukes?” Remus offers. Sirius isn’t quite sure if they’re still playing Healer. Pomfrey does prescribe it often, but Remus also just likes chocolate and always has a slab in his section of the room.

“Pop it in my mouth? I can’t exactly take it from you.” 

“Your arms will be back in a few hours, buddy.”

“Yeah, I know. Until then, feed me.”

And because James and Remus are good boyfriends, as good as he is to them, they do.


End file.
